John 2:1-15
“Speak to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord” - Ephesians 5:19 NKJV
Chutzpah is a Hebrew word that has been adopted into Yiddish and then English. Chutzpah has been defined as audacity, insolence, impudence, gall, brazen nerve, effrontery, incredible guts, presumption, and arrogance. Yet something essential about chutzpah is missing from all these words. Chutzpah can be destructive and ugly or vital and fantastic, but never in-between. (www.Chabad.org)
It is an amazing word, especially with its dual implication of being ugly or fantastic. But it’s often a matter of perspective whether the actions are viewed as holy or otherwise. For centuries, warped notions of propriety might have made the determination.
Still, in parts of India, a Dalit (untouchable) shopping in the “wrong” store would be considered an affront. In America, a few decades ago, a Black person sitting at the front of the bus would provoke scorn, or a woman standing in a pulpit would be seen as blasphemous. But thankfully, through the holy chutzpah of many, norms have evolved.
In fact, the great story of Scripture is that of many women not sitting on their hands, allowing their fate to be dictated to them or their people. It was their very impudence and audacity that helped God’s work of salvation continue—their holy chutzpah.
“Well-behaved women seldom make history” is certainly true for the Bible.
Rahab, the Canaanite prostitute, spied for the Israelites, helping them defeat Jericho while saving her family.
Ruth connived to create a match for her daughter-in-law, Naomi, by threatening the reputation of a very important man (who is actually Rahab’s son!). They eventually became the great-grandparents of King David.
Esther risked her life by appearing before the king unannounced. Her gumption worked, and she outwitted the evil Haman by exposing his devious plans to exterminate the Jews.
And Mary simply orders Jesus, the young man she knows to be God, to turn water into wine, rather than asking, setting the stage for his first miracle.
All of these women just as easily could have been labeled as insolent and arrogant. But their chutzpah was born not just of temerity but of a demand for our RESPECT!
Another woman with chutzpah took the song of an adored, famous colleague, Otis Redding. He sang about a man wanting respect in his own home, and she completely reversed the meaning, adding the now-famous spelling out, “R-E-S-P-E-C-T.” Aretha Franklin took the ballad, jazzed it up with backup singers and energy. Redding commented on it in 1967 at the Monterey Pop Festival by saying, “This next song is a song that a girl took away from me. A good friend of mine, this girl, she just took the song, but I’m still going to do it anyway.” Later, he stated he liked what Aretha did with the song.
As I listened to the song again in contrast with Otis Redding’s (an admittedly excellent version), I am simply in awe not only of her vocal chops but her confident, powerful presence. I realized she exemplified the difference between someone who demands respect as opposed to someone who commands it. If somebody shouts long enough, “You must respect me! You must respect me!” it’s clear that they don’t feel that respect and perhaps don’t truly respect themselves. Ms. Franklin’s personal presence, the way in which she sings, the way in which she interprets the words, commands respect. You simply give it to her by virtue of her charisma, confidence, and message.
Ms. Franklin received tremendous respect for her music. In fact, one year Rolling Stone Magazine voted her version of "Respect" as number one on a list of the 500 greatest songs of all time. They explained their choice: “[It] catalyzed rock & roll, gospel, and blues to create the model for soul music that artists still look to today.”
I remember when I first heard Aretha Franklin’s version. I realize now that she did not so much demand respect from others but commanded it, which is true of all these women. The way Ms. Franklin performed it, brimming with vitality, confidence, and truth, I am convinced spurred many to discover that respect is something God gives by virtue of our birth and cannot be taken or given by mere mortals.
In 1972, a few years after Ms. Franklin sang “Respect,” a tiny young blond thing, mini-skirt and all, commanded respect at a staid Presbyterian Church on the Upper West Side, Broadway Presbyterian. Known as the mini-skirted Jesus freak, Abigail Rian Evans was the first installed woman pastor in New York City Presbytery. At only 35 years old, she brokered peace during the Columbia protests between the students and administration. (Would that she had been available these past couple of years!)
She commanded rather than demanded respect in the same fashion as Ms. Franklin. She didn’t try to convince people that she deserved to be a minister; she simply did ministry. Mary did not have to tell Jesus to listen to his mother—she spoke with authority, and he listened. Without a means to survive or a husband to take care of her, Ruth refused to sit on the sidelines and await her fate. She moved forward in bold trust that God would work with her to bring about a good future.
All these women demonstrate that when you believe in what God has given you, who God has made you to be, and what God has challenged you to do with it, you will simply command respect by virtue of the passion and purpose with which you act. From the Detroit Free Press, critic Brian McCollum wrote:
“Franklin's song has been dissected in books and academic papers, held up as a groundbreaking feminist and civil rights statement in an era when such declarations weren't always easy to make.” When asked about her audacious stance amidst the feminist and Civil Rights Movement, Franklin told the Detroit Free Press, “I don't think it's bold at all. I think it's quite natural that we all want respect—and should get it.” (July 13, 2017, Detroit Free Press, as quoted from Wikipedia)
If we live our lives according to the morals and principles that God has taught us, then respect belongs to us all. But not all commands for respect deserve the same attention.
Chutzpah means having the gumption to flout conventions to achieve our ends, but whether it’s holy or not depends on the person. The type of respect that the biblical women commanded was different than the ways in which we see power exercised in the world today. All too often, those who demand rather than command respect are using leverage to create fear in those to whom they relate.
This happens with those who have official power, elected officials, or bosses. It’s the type of boss that everyone is too anxious to tell the truth to. That person demands a certain fealty that gives the aura of respect, but in fact, it is most often contempt coupled with fear. But this tactic is not only used by those in authority. We see it exercised by those with the power of a microphone, a keyboard, or a social media following that attempt to demand respect for their opinions by threatening the livelihood of those with whom they disagree. Both of these approaches are the ugly and destructive type of chutzpah.
In contrast, there is another aspect of respect that comes out in Ms. Franklin’s version. If someone truly respects us, they should respect us enough to be forthright and open with us. Ms.Franklin and her co-creators inserted this notion in her version of the song.
The repeated “sock it to me” line, sung by Franklin’s sisters, was an idea that Carolyn and Aretha had worked out together. Aretha said, “Some of the girls were saying that to the fellas, like ‘sock it to me’ in this way or ‘sock it to me’ in that way. It’s not sexual. It was nonsexual, just a cliché line.” (Wikipedia) It can simply mean something like “tell me” or “give it to me straight.”
If we fear someone rather than respect them, we will never give it to them straight. But if we truly see another as a person of value, as a person made by God, then not only will we be willing to speak the truth, but we will want to speak it, to be open with them.
It was the type of truth that Jesus told. He didn’t sugarcoat his message, and he was especially open with the disciples. At the Last Supper, He told them difficult truths about themselves, about how they would betray Him. Upon hearing this, Peter insisted he would never! Jesus did not shy away from the tense moment and gave the hardest news to Peter: “Before the rooster crows, you will deny me three times.”
And granted, there is a certain willingness in today’s world to speak hard truths. Unfortunately, too often, we’re only willing to do so because we’ve written someone off, and we just want to inflict pain.
Jesus respected the disciples enough to tell them the hard truths, but He did not end with it. “I no longer call you servants but friends… and there is no greater love than this: a friend lays down his life for others.” He continues to promise them that He will bring them to a heavenly kingdom eventually. Jesus certainly “socked it to” the disciples. He respected them enough to allow them to see the truth about themselves, but it was only out of love. True respect—authentic respect—can only be born from love.
May we have holy chutzpah to flout those norms which degrade and diminish ourselves and others, and may we be open enough to want others to “sock it to me” out of love.and the Holy Ghost. Amen.
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